


Thanks

by BloodRedRidingHood



Series: I'll Be Your Shield [16]
Category: Captain America: The First Avenger - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Backstory, F/M, Natasha goes to therapy, Natasha opens up, Steve has a new mission
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-21
Updated: 2013-08-21
Packaged: 2017-12-24 04:53:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/935605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BloodRedRidingHood/pseuds/BloodRedRidingHood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She longed to be back at work, missed the weight of her gun strapped to her thigh.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thanks

**Author's Note:**

> A simple entry, picking up about five weeks after "Order."
> 
> Part 16 of hawkwardeye's 30 Day Drabble Challenge. Make sure you read parts 1-15!

March had faded into April, the early spring chill had melted away, and the flowers and trees were budding all over the city. Natasha breathed in the warm air as she walked down the street. It was so nice out, and she loathed being stuck in an office for an hour.

She looked out over the city one last time before entering the lobby and sighed. It was only for an hour, and hopefully the last time she had to do this.

Twenty minutes later, Natasha sat down on the couch in Dr Parker's office. Things had started off a bit rocky between them, but over the weeks, Natasha had opened up to him. Not too much, of course, but enough to give him an idea of how she operated. They had mostly talked about her time at SHIELD; her missions were a popular topic of conversation. Sometimes Dr Parker would ask about her last mission. He often asked if she felt like hurting herself or anyone else, if she had any flashbacks, and even if she felt comfortable getting physically involved with anyone after what had happened. She avoided those questions, preferring to keep her private life just that. 

She had a feeling that it was her unwillingness to talk about her feeling that was keeping her from being reinstated as an agent. She longed to be back at work, missed the weight of her gun strapped to her thigh. She decided that today was going to be the day she laid it all out on the table.

"So, Miss Romanoff," Dr Parker said, uncapping his pen. "How have you been since our last visit?"

Natasha gave him a small smile. "Well, I've been really good, Dr Parker. That's kind of what I wanted to talk about today."

"Oh?" Dr Parker made a note in her file. "Go on."

And so Natasha told him. She told him about Steve, starting back at the first time they had spent any time together. It seemed so long ago, now that she thought about it. But she remembered everything about it: the snow, the hot chocolate, the way that he looked at her. 

When Natasha had spilled everything, she sat back, pleased with herself. This was a first for her. She hadn't even told Clint all the details. She waited until Dr Parker had finished writing before continuing. 

"It's been incredible," she said. "I just…I have a hard time actually vocalizing how I feel. I want to, but the last time I did…" She trailed off. Dr Parker was well aware of the dreams she had about James, and about how disconnected she had become after Clint had gotten hurt. "I'm scared of telling him and then losing him."

"That's understandable, Miss Romanoff," Dr Parker replied. "Anyone who has been through what you have would have some reservations about opening up. But you've taken an impressive step today. Unfortunately, that's all the time we have." Dr Parker capped his pen and stood up. "I would like you to come back in two weeks. I think it will be good to give you a break, let you get back into your normal schedule."

Natasha didn't say anything, afraid to come to the wrong conclusion. She was desperate to get back to work.

"Welcome back, Agent Romanoff," Dr Parker finally said. He held out his hand to help Natasha stand, and she took it. Straightening out her skirt, she smiled at him, and he returned it.

"I have no idea how to thank you, Dr Parker," she said. "Seriously. It means so much."

After getting a form signed, she rushed up to the fifth floor, where the conference rooms were. She knew that's where Steve liked to go over files. She found him hunched over a thick folder, which he snapped closed as soon as he saw her.

"Hey, sweetheart," he called to her. He picked up his area and walked over to her, planting a kiss on top of her head. "What are you doing here? I thought you were banned."

She smiled up at him. "Agent Romanoff has been cleared for duty. I report back on Monday morning, 0900."

Steve wrapped his free arm around her waist. "I'm so happy for you, sweetheart. I know how much you've missed being here."

Natasha leaned her head on Steve's shoulder as they walked out. Steve walked over to the clerk and handed her the file, and then they made their way down to the lobby.

They chatted as they walked to Central Park. Steve told her that he was being given an investigative mission; there was an assassin going around and killing several high-profile politicians. He didn't have any information other than that, not even a name or photograph. The only thing that they knew for sure was that he was Russian, and that bit of information had come from a witness who had died mysteriously three days after giving their statement.

Natasha frowned as she worked through this. At least now she would be able to help him. Any Russian assassin could have ties to her past, and that was most definitely not good news.

She gave another silent thanks to Dr Parker, and leaned into Steve again. Regardless of who this new mission was, she wasn't going to leave his side. She wasn't going to lose him.


End file.
